If your boyfriend is dependent on his parents and you want to change that you have to be more than his girlfriend. You need to help your boyfriend to get out of this situation if he is the guy you are planning to stick to.
For your boyfriend to develop in life and give you the future you all want he has to start depending on himself and not his parents.
Your boyfriend depends on his parents because he doesn’t have a means to support himself right now.
This tells you one thing about him; he is not ambitious. He is too tacked to his comfort zone and that is why he is not doing anything to change this.
Anyway, before you conclude anything about your boyfriend’s situation you need to understand why he is in it.
Maybe he has a reason why he is still dependent on his parents for now.
In this article, I will share with you what to do if your boyfriend is dependent on his parents.
This is what to do when your boyfriend is dependent on his parents;
1. Find out why he depends on his parents.
Your boyfriend depends on his parents for financial aid and you don’t understand why he does that.
Don’t start judging him, say or do anything without you understanding why depends on them.
You need to know why he depends on his parents before you start finding ways to change the situation.
Maybe he gave his parents everything and whenever he needs something he calls them.
You never know until you take your time to find out.
I know you are not happy that your man is still dependent on his parents for everything.
He won’t give you the financial security you are searching for in the future.
That is not the man you dreamt of having in your life.
How can you find out why your boyfriend is dependent on his parents?
The first thing you can do to find out why he is dependent on his parents is to observe his life.
Is there anything that your boyfriend works on?
Does he depend on his parents because he doesn’t have the means to support himself?
Is he dependent on his parents because he is lazy and unmotivated?
Is your boyfriend dependent on his parents because that is what he wants?
Try to answer the questions above for you to have an idea of why he depends on his parents.
If you can’t answer the questions by yourself then you will have to sit down and talk to him.
Talk to him and find ways to make him open up to you about why he relies on his parents for everything.
Just start the talk with what you are planning to do together in life, the places you want to be, where you want to live, and your goals.
A conversation like this will make your boyfriend open up about what he feels about being dependent on his parents.
If he doesn’t have a plan in life or anything that he is hoping to achieve in life but just exists for the moment, you will know about it.
But if he is dependent on his parents because there is a plan he is working on to change his life, you will also know about it.
Listen to what he says about the kind of life he wants to live with you and how is aims to attain it.
This will give you an idea of why he is dependent on his parents.
If he is unambitious, lazy, and unmotivated you will know about it. But if he is dependent on his parents for now because he is busy saving money to start his business before he decides to rely on himself you will also know about it.
So, communicate with your boyfriend about what he is thinking and planning about your life together.
He will tell you what you need to know.
2. Let him know how you feel about his dependence on his parents.
If you don’t like the idea of your boyfriend being dependent on his parents you have to talk to him about it.
The only way you will strike his nerve and wake him up is when you open up about how you feel.
When your boyfriend is doing something that you are not happy about don’t just keep it to yourself.
You won’t solve problems like this in a relationship.
If you don’t like that he is financially dependent on his parents tell him about it.
When he knows that you aren’t happy that he relies on his parents for financial support, he will feel the need to change things.
No man wants to be seen as incompetent. He will want to do things to show you that he is also capable of turning his life the way he feels.
This will push him to think of ways to start turning his life around and find ways to be financially independent.
But if you don’t say anything about it, your boyfriend won’t think of ways of changing his life.
He will be stuck in his comfort zone, he will waste his time and the future you are hoping to build with him will just vanish in thin air.
So, if you don’t like that he is dependent on his parents talk to him about it and also share with him how you would like him to handle things.
This conversation you will have about him being financially dependent on his parents will give you an idea of what he thinks about it.
The response he will give you when you open up to him about what you feel will let you know what your boyfriend thinks of doing about his situation.
If he is clueless and just moving by the wind you will know that from the response he will give you.
But if he has a plan in mind that he is slowly executing he will open to you about it.
3. Give your boyfriend a challenge to change his life.
When your boyfriend is dependent on his parents and you want him to turn his life the other way, give him a challenge.
Be a reason for him to stand up for himself and work for the life you are all dreaming of having.
This is what will push your boyfriend to start working on his life and getting out of his comfort zone.
Your man needs to start building his life and he won’t do that if you won’t pose a challenge to him.
If he is a guy who truly cares about you, wants a future with you and he ready to give you what you want in life, you will motivate him to start working on his life.
How can you give your boyfriend a challenge that will stop him from depending on his parents and start working on his life?
Be honest with your boyfriend and just tell him how you would like him to be. Share with him the kind of man you would love him to be. Also, sit down with him and tell him what you would like him to achieve by the end of the year. Set a realistic goal for him and put him to work.
The goal can be for him to get a job at the end of the year, learn a skill that will make him money, start a side hustle, and save a certain amount of money.
These kinds of challenges you will be putting your boyfriend on will open up his mind and start thinking of ways he can achieve them without relying on his parents.
If your boyfriend is ambitious, smart, and hard-working, he will appreciate you and use this as an opportunity to get out of his comfort zone and start working on his life.
He doesn’t want to let you down. So, he will put himself to work and start turning things around.
The main aim of these challenges is to make your boyfriend start depending on himself and thinking of creative ways to make a life for himself.
As he is going through these challenges he will be forced to change, be disciplined, and find means to achieve what he is working on.
As your boyfriend is trying to work on these challenges, this is the next thing you have to do.
4. Support him and help him to make the change you want to see in him.
You need to support your boyfriend and help him to get his feet on the ground.
It won’t be possible for him to work this on his own especially if he has been depending on his parents for so long.
He needs your company, support, and advice if he has to change his life around.
Be with him every step of the way, be there for him when he needs you, and help him with the things needs to be independent.
Your support is mostly important if you want him to stop depending on his parents.
Motivate him and let him know that you believe in him. This is what will supercharge him not to give up on anything he wants to work on to be financially independent.
Be the reason he will wake up at 4 am just to work on his projects or side hustles.
Shows your boyfriend what it means to be financially independent and its benefits.
Don’t criticize him when he fails, don’t laugh at him when he can’t get it right, and don’t give up on him when he doesn’t meet your expectations.
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. You need to be that woman who pushes him to the success he is seeking.
If you need to help your boyfriend work on his self-esteem and self-confidence share with him ways he can do that.
You will need to go the extra mile to find resources that will help your boyfriend make the transformation he is hoping to achieve.
If you are lazy and unmotivated, it will be hard to push your boyfriend towards the change you want to see in him.
This will force you to also work on yourself as an individual as you are working hard to change your boyfriend too.
When you support and help your boyfriend in everything he is working on it will bring the two of you closer, strengthen your relationship, and make you feel lucky to have each other.
The challenges that you are going to face along the way as you are helping your boyfriend attain financial independence will tie you to each other.
So, don’t look at that as a burden but a blessing.
5. Share with him the effects of depending on parents at his age.
To push your boyfriend further to be financially independent share with him the effects of depending on his parents.
Be honest with him and talk about every possibility that can happen when he relies on his parents for everything.
Start by talking about your future. Share with him where you want to be five years to come.
If he will still be depending on his parents for what he needs will you make that achievement?
Share with him what will happen when his parents decide that it’s enough. If they stop supporting him financially how will his life turn out to be?
Let your boyfriend know that his parents will at one point leave all responsibilities to him.
What will happen when he has to man up and be responsible for them when they are older?
Sharing with your boyfriend the reality of how things can end up when he depends on his parents for everything will open his eyes and motivate him to start taking charge of his life.
It will also motivate him to start pushing harder on things that he wants to achieve in life to make his parents proud.
When he understands what is at stake for depending on his parents, he will start finding out ways to be financially dependent.
6. If he doesn’t want change, end the relationship.
If you have tried everything I have shared with you in this article and you have been patient with him but he doesn’t want to make any changes to his life, you will have no choice but to break up with him.
Walk away from him because he won’t give you the future you are hoping to achieve.
He will only be a burden to you in the future because you will have to be responsible for him.
You will have to spend money on him, help him pay his bills, and give him money for his needs.
A man like this will never be a good father to your kids. How will he even take care of them if he can’t take care of himself?
Is this the kind of man you want to have in your life?
If you have tried to suggest ways to change him but he is still reluctant and in his comfort zone, this man is unambitious.
The moment his parents won’t be able to support him, he will start relying on you for everything he needs.
Today you may be able to support him financially what happens when tomorrow you can’t do that?
You will end up being homeless!
Lastly…
If your boyfriend is dependent on his parents you need to find ways to motivate him to turn his life around.
Try to encourage him to come up with ways to start earning money and build the life he wants.
Challenge your boyfriend to achieve things and work on improving himself every single day.
If he loves you and doesn’t want to lose you to someone else, he will always put in the effort to make you happy by achieving what he wants to have in life.
What should you do if your boyfriend doesn’t want to get out of his comfort zone and start depending on himself?
If your boyfriend doesn’t want to do anything to change his life and be financially independent you will have no choice but to be honest with him about how you feel about it.
Let him know that you will leave him if he doesn’t want to start working on his life and rely on himself.
If he loves you and doesn’t want to lose you, he will start making a change immediately.
You also have to be patient with your boyfriend as he is trying to be financially independent. It’s not easy.
It will take time for your boyfriend to get where you want him to be. Be there to support him and always remind him why he is working for what he wants to have in life.
Related reads;
