If your boyfriend tells his mom about your fights you need to find a way to work things out. I know you are not happy about what he does, but he may be doing it because he doesn’t have a choice.
In this article, I will share what you should do when your boyfriend tells his mother about your fights.
Some things should remain between the two of you. You have to sit down and solve your issues by yourselves.
Your boyfriend may not see that right now and that is why he shares everything negative that happens between the two of you.
He needs to understand the mess it can create in your relationship if he keeps doing it.
You need to find an appropriate way to make your boyfriend understand that what he does is wrong.
If you don’t do it correctly it might increase the negative tension between the two of you.
This is what to do when your boyfriend tells his mom about your fights;
1. Find out why he tells his mother about your fights.
Your boyfriend tells his mother about your fights, you have no idea why he does it.
Before you think of doing or saying anything that is going to increase the negative tension between the two of you, you need to find out why he does it.
If you go directly to him and start yelling at him about why he shares what is happening between the two of you with his mother, you will end up causing more chaos.
There is no way will resolve the conflicts between the two of you. You need to be smart when handling this issue because your relationship is already breaking down into pieces.
Why does he always tell his mother about your fights?
Why doesn’t he sit down with you and share ways on how you can work things out?
Is there anything that pulls him to his mother more than you?
Read also; Boyfriend Chooses His Mother Over Me: Do This
All these questions need answers for you to figure out how you are going to stop him from telling his mother about your fights.
If there is no way your boyfriend can face you when a fight erupts between the two of you, he won’t sit down and talk to you after a fight.
On the other side, if he finds tranquility in talking to his mother about your fights than you, he will always run to her.
If there is no way he can solve the issue with you because you are on fire, he will always go to his mother to tell her about what happened.
How did you know that he told his mom about your fights? His mother talked to you about it.
This tells you one thing about him, he is overwhelmed about the fights between the two of you.
He doesn’t know how to solve them and that is why he shares this with his mother.
He wants his mom to help him out and solve your relationship disputes.
If you don’t understand why he tells his mother about your fights, you will have no choice but to face him.
To face him will require you to work things out first and that is where the next section of this article comes in.
2. Resolve your conflicts with him first.
If what your boyfriend does bothers you will have no choice but to work things out.
When there are no fights between the two of you, he won’t share anything with his mother.
You need to resolve your conflicts first if you want to stop your boyfriend from doing what he does.
Right now he is mad at you, and so are you. You won’t find a peaceful way of ending this conflict if you are both still mad at each other.
You need to find out why he shares your fights with his mother.
To do that you need to be at peace with each other. Can you just spare a day without fighting and talk maturely about this matter?
You can do that I presume.
The first question you have to ask yourselves is, why are you always fighting?
Are you the problem?
Is there anything that breaks the peace between the two of you?
Do you handle each other the way you used to?
Are they petty arguments?
Maybe it has something to do with things that happened in the past.
You need to find the source of the conflicts. Understand what your boyfriend needs from you.
Find a way that you will both get a common ground to work your issues out.
If he is the cause of the fights and you are mad at him, find a way to forgive to work things out.
The truth is that if you won’t forgive him, there is no way you are going to work things out.
When things are calm that is when you should sit down and talk to him about what bothers you the most.
You are not happy about him sharing with his mother about your fights.
Ask him why he tells his mother about your fights. If things are calm, he will open up about why he does it.
From there, you will find a way to stop him from telling his mother about your misunderstandings.
3. Share how you feel when he tells his mother about your fights.
Your boyfriend doesn’t know how you feel about what he does. He doesn’t think that it affects you at all.
And that is why he keeps doing it when you get into fights. He runs to his mother and tells her everything and how it went down.
If he doesn’t know what he does affects you he won’t stop doing it.
He will continue telling his mother about your fights and this will affect you in one way or another.
It’s time for you to talk to him about what he does.
How do you feel about him sharing your fights with his mother?
It annoys you, right? Does it make you angrier?
Share everything you feel about what he does. If he hurts your feelings don’t hide it anymore.
Politely share with him how you feel about what he does. He is your boyfriend, he cares about you and that is why he does what he does.
When he realizes that he is hurting your feelings by telling his mother about your fights, he will learn to control himself not to do it.
He won’t know anything unless you talk to him about it.
If he doesn’t know that he is making things worse for you by telling his mother about your fights he will stop.
For him, it might be a simple thing because he loves and cares so much about his mother.
He feels that she should know anything that happens to him.
His mother is the only one who brings him comfort when things between the two of you aren’t okay and that is why he does it.
He doesn’t realize the harm it brings to your relationship. When he knows that it’s not a good thing, he will stop it as long as he still wants the best for the two of you.
4. Let him know how this might affect your relationship.
You have to be honest with him about what he does and how it affects you if you want him to stop.
He will only stop when he realizes the damage he is bringing into your relationship.
Your relationship right now is a mess. I am sure he is unhappy and that is why he tells his mother about your fights.
He wants to make things okay between the two of you and that is why he tells his mother about it.
Your boyfriend thinks that he is doing the right thing and that is why he keeps doing it.
You need to put some sense into his head that what he does keeps making things worse.
His mother calls you and starts arguing with you and this makes you feel more devastated.
His mother shares all these issues that are happening in your relationship with her entire family.
His family starts to develop negative feelings towards you, and the peace between you and your boyfriend’s family is just falling into pieces.
Your boyfriend’s family starts talking bad about you and this keeps on ruining things between you and your boyfriend’s family.
You are now the bad guy in the story since they will always take your boyfriend’s side.
Read also; Boyfriend’s Family Talks Bad About Me: Do This
This stresses you out and you can’t even find a peaceful way of solving things between you and your boyfriend because his family is also at you.
What he does keeps affecting you even far much worse. You need to let your boyfriend know how this affects your relationship with his family.
If your boyfriend cares about the peace between you and his family he will stop what he is doing.
But if he wants his family to hate you and find a way to drive you out of his life, he will keep doing it.
You never know, maybe he wants you to break up and he is using it as a way to make you walk away from him.
After sharing with your boyfriend about how this affects your relationship with his family, do what I am about to share with you in the next section of this article.
5. Find ways to create peace between the two of you.
If your boyfriend tells his mother about your fights he will keep doing it if they still keep going on and he doesn’t know how to solve them.
When the fights are too much for him to handle he will keep telling his mother about it to help him bring peace between the two of you.
If you want him to stop telling his mother about your fights, you need to find ways to create peace.
You need to talk to your boyfriend about ways you can use to keep the peace between the two of you.
It can be that he doesn’t know how he should handle the conflicts between the two of you and that is why he always tells his mother about them.
Share with him how you would like him to approach the misunderstandings between the two of you.
If there is anything other than telling his mother about your fights you would like him to do you will need to talk to him about it.
You won’t create peace if you don’t talk to him about it.
Encourage him to face you back and talk about how you can work things out instead of telling his mother about them.
Your boyfriend needs a way to know how to talk to you so that he doesn’t have to share what happens between the two of you with his mother.
This is what you should work on right now if you want him to stop doing this.
He will understand you and do the right thing if he cares about you and wants to fix things between the two of you.
Lastly…
If your boyfriend tells his mother about your fights the first thing you should know is that he doesn’t know a way to handle them.
He is overwhelmed, it’s not something normal for him. It can be that in his previous relationships, something like this didn’t happen often.
Now he is with you and you always get into fights, he doesn’t know how to talk about it with you.
The only person he thinks he should talk to about it is his mother. He wants his mother to help him make peace between the two of you.
Don’t start saying things that will make your boyfriend feel less of a man he is because he tells his mother about your fights.
This will only make things worse and the conflicts will never end. It might end your relationship.
The tips I have shared in this article will help you out, so put them to use.
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